April and June

Not remembering, not allowing myself to feel again
It hurts, this time it does.

I still wonder why it went the other direction
Not enough, not strong and not brave
You came and you left.

Roads ahead I still hear your sound
Your face is present...
So present it burns.

Silence kills me
Sound annoys me
Waves are storming harder than yesterday
And yesterday was when you belonged.

Not enough, never enough
I'm still asking too much
When I made mistakes
You made mistakes too.

Ghost of frozen dreams
Idol of hopes and tears
Water and liquid flows on my face
Tired of waiting, expecting and craving.

You only you
You came and then left
You praised and lied...

Self-centered selfish rat.

What happens right now?
Not tonight not tommorow
Not yesterday not this morning.

It comes and goes and trespasses my wall
It makes me chill and makes me cry
You red great tornado who destroys and leaves no clue behind.

Hoping, desiring, wishing, and dreaming
You, so unique, so special
So torrent and sexual.

Two ways, two choices
Where to go
What to say
Ordinary and extraordinary.

Poles of fear
Listening to deaf words
Emptiness above the clouds
Low and go.

Together : April and June
Kites flying above us
Lies and mysteries cursing
Our story trust mixes with fantasy.

Treats within layers
Greatness of words and water of hopes
Joy... lust yellow and green
Rain torrent give my heart beat

Bowling in summer
Crying in autumn...

Where have you been?
Not wondering but hiding
Go deep go deep
Heal and retreat.

Illussions of tomorrow
Crack my interior.

Trick and retreat
Taking not giving
Harsh and miserable
Torn and rebellious.