White Flowers on a Sunday Night

On Avenue B
I am watching the Mexican locking his bike
Trying to focus
I try to speak my language but I can't.

I know it is not what I am supposed to be doing
But fuck it, what else can I do?
I've been drunk for the past six hours.

I need to focus and remember it is Sunday
Oh no
My dark side its coming out.

I don't know what I am thinking anymore
I've been drowing my day in Tequila
It feels nice right now
But I know it won't last.

I smoke my favorite cigarettes even though I am sick
And I am coughing
But I couldn't care less
It's bad, it's bad
I can't help being a bit self-destructive.

And I've been having a good time
And I haven't call him in my drunkenness
And I wish it was different
But I can't help it.

I miss his face
I miss him...

I miss him standing next to me
I miss his kisses
I miss his presence...

Oh fuck
I am so drunk.

Standing on the sidewalk
People passing by
All lonely and stupid
All pretending to be someone else.

I am laughing at them
I am hating their social masks.

My eyes are so red
And I am dying of thirst
Living the moment
I am just thinking I am exactly like them.

And I wish I would be better
But I'm like the rest
I am not better
I am even worse than most of them.

My senses start to get all over the place
Trying so hard to look at people with a straight face
I am starting to talk nonsense
I can't help it.

White flowers you are so beautiful
How do you survive the winter?
I am so jealous

I can't even survive tonight.